Bathroom Banksy: Proofing and Peeing

You just can’t escape poor punctuation.

While taking a recent “break,” in the men’s room, I looked up to see a few lyrics from a rock song scrawled on the wall in front of me. Not all that uncommon in a college bathroom.

The words were from The Outfield’s 1996 hit “Your Love." I am guessing our graffiti artist didn’t pay attention in writing class.

He wrote the first line of the song as follows:
“Josies on a vacation far away.”

Any grammar geek will notice the missing apostrophe in the first word faster than you can say “one-hit wonder.” Clearly, the contraction stands for “Josie IS on a vacation far away.” Still, our bathroom Banksy missed it and that leaves me in a dilemma.

The editor in me wants to pull out a red marker and correct the error, but would that make me a vandal as well? Who said proofing was easy?

Breaking News: Radio's Big Lie

Remember the pre-Fox News Alert world? When bulletins were actually news worthy? Now, it seems, breaking news is nothing more than a teaser.

Like a Pavlovian dog, my ears perked up when I heard the phrase “Breaking News” on NYC’s WCBS Newsradio 880 this morning. Actually, the complete phrase was “Breaking News coming up after this…”

What followed was a commercial, then a promo for the TV show “Undercover Boss.” Then came the breaking news.

In his book “Amusing Ourselves to Death,” Neil Postman wrote about the phrase “Now this…” He lamented how reporters (“talking hair-doos”) move from tragedy to trade without giving any story its due.

Now, “Breaking News” has become its polar bookend. Devoid of meaning and dangled like a lure designed to catch the biggest audience share. As a sportsman, I know fish eventually wise up. They learn to differentiate between lures and real bait and move on. If only we could do the same.

PR Success: Learn to Win by Watching the NY Giants Lose

The text books are full of great ideas from successful organizations. The real lessons, however, are found in times of despair.

Take the NY Giants. Following a series of missteps, their season is slowly spiraling out of control. It’s easy to put on a brave face when you’re winning, but we often see an organization’s true colors when the losing starts.

While the Giant’s on-field aptitude remains in question, their communications are at a championship level. The next time your organization finds itself on a losing streak, take these cues from the Giant’s PR playbook.

Take Ownership
The only thing Americans likes less than losers are liars. Week after week the Giants step up to the media and take full responsibility for their woeful play. It might be easy for coaches and quarterbacks to pass the buck, but there were times last week when Coach Tom Coughlin seemed to be battling with Eli Manning to see who could shoulder the most blame.

Don’t Point Fingers
United we stand, divided we fall, and all that. We still remember that motto for one main reason: it’s true. Note that there is a clear distinction between honestly discussing your failures and pointing fingers. It’s perfectly fine for Manning to say a player ran the wrong route, but watch how he doesn’t harp on it, and most every interview ends with him saying he must play better.

Stick to Your Routine
A change in routine signals disorganization and panic. Many Giants players and coaches have regularly-schedule media appearances in our New York market. And they keep them, even though they know full well that they are in for a grilling. Man up and move on.

Keep in In-House
Nothing comes from losing unless you take a good hard look at why it’s happening. You can bet that behind closed doors the Giants are yelling, passing the buck and pointing fingers. Working through the issue is the only way to beat it. But they know the difference between hashing it out in private and airing it out in public.

Remember, by maintaining a solid communications plan during hard times, you are one step closer to winning. And as Vince Lombardi once said, “Winning isn’t everything, it’s the only thing.”

Binge-Watching: Four Keys to Success

In the pre-DVR era, I used to videotape sporting events to watch at a later time. During those tenuous hours between recording and viewing I walked on egg shells for fear I would unwittingly discover the game’s outcome. Friends had to be avoided for fear of a score leak. Newscasts? Verboten! I went radio silent until I saw the time-shifted game for myself.

Now, media goes with us, and so do the games. However, I still walk on egg shells and the reason can be summed up in two words: “Breaking Bad.” As I binge watch my way through Season Four, every day is a minefield through which I tip toe, leaving the smallest footprints this side of Al Gore.

So far, I have been successful. Outside, it’s 2013, but in my media mind it’s still the summer of 2011 and the fourth season of “Breaking Bad” is as fresh as the coffee I gulp to stay up and watch “just one more episode.” But my success has been no accident. It takes sharply-honed avoidance skills to win at this game. So no matter what your binge du jour, here are a few tips to help keep you in the dark.

Declare Your Intentions
If you are binge watching an old show, make sure your friends, family, associates, mail carrier and everyone in between knows what you are up to. You can offer those closest to you rewards for their spoiler-keeping abilities. Dinner, drinks, maybe both. Conversely, if you are in a position of power, threaten those around you who might let the odd plot twist slip. If my college students tell me anything more specific than “Sklyer is a bitch,” they know they will fail.

Hold Your Tongue
There’s a reason certain TV programs are called “water cooler” shows. People love to talk about them. Discussing your binge passion with others, no matter how tempting, is an invitation for disaster. Go about your business. Draw no attention to your secret life. As the Pollo Man says, “hide in plain sight.”

Be Like the Ostrich
We are exposed to thousands of messages a day, and only a handful of them come from people we know. Not only is Big Brother watching; he’s talking too. And he is intent on tipping off your binge storyline. Web sites, TV commercials, morning radio zoo crews and award shows are only a few of the outlets you need to avoid during your watching period. Put your head in the sand and avoid them all. Period.

Hyper-Binge
The longer it takes you to finish your viewing, the more likely someone will divulge sensitive information. Therefore, reduce your spoiler window and watch as much as you can as fast as you can.

In short, the successful binge watcher is an anti-social creature who must put a good chunk of their life on hold in order to scratch their viewing itch. Is it worth it? You bet. And if anyone ridicules you for obsessing over a season of television that has long past, just channel your inner Heisenberg, look them in the eye and say “Over? It’s not over until I say it’s over.”

Cell Phones are Bad for Business

I just got back from a trade show and, despite the hopes of the event organizers, here is my main takeaway: Cell Phones are Killing Your Business.

This event had about 150 exhibitors. At any given time, maybe one third of them were engaging attendees (which is the whole purpose of a trade show). To my shock (but alack, not surprise), about half of the people working the other tables were sitting there texting. OK, maybe they were checking emails, but you get the point. You can’t engage customers with your nose in your phone!

If I were to approach these people and ask why they were wasting their time and money (after all, they could text at home for free), I imagine they would make the following excuses…to which I offer some winning alternatives.

Them: I only text when there is on one at my booth.
Me: Guess what? If you keep texting no one will visit your booth. It’s Nonverbal Communication 101. Make eye contact. Smile. Engage!

Them: I was checking in with my boss.
Me: Your boss can wait. You have a limited window of opportunity at this networking event. Use it before it closes. Your boss will be there later. These people will not.

Them: There’s nothing else to do.
Me: Why not stand up (chairs, like cell phones, should be left in your car) and talk to the people at the booths near yours. Introduce yourself. Ask how business is. Learn something.

Yes we need to stay connected. But there is a time and a place, and the few hours you have to engage potential customers on the floor of a trade show is not one of them.

Job Interview Tip: Anticipate

When teaching the art of impromptu speech, one key point always surprises both media training clients and public speaking students: Anticipate. The idea of anticipating an impromptu speech, after all, seems like an oxymoron.

To stress my point, I use a job interview scenario. Something most everyone can relate to and a skill at which we all wish to excel. Follow these simple tips and you’ll do just that.

Make a List
While there is a current HR trend towards unique interview questions, I still believe that most interviewees can guess about 80% of the questions they will be asked. Pull out a pen and paper and start thinking.

Craft Your Answers
You know that list you just made? Review it and map out your answers. Think them through and couch them in terms that will resonate with your audience (the interviewer). Trust me; nothing feels better than being asked an interview question that you already know the answer to. A positive byproduct of this is that you will exude confidence, which makes you an even more appealing candidate.

Speak Up
Don’t simple think through your answers, speak through them. Practice your delivery out loud several times and listen to how you sound. This extra step will go a long way toward improving your interview image.

Mind the Gap
Early in his working life, a friend of mine decided to follow his heart’s desire to be an actor. For 18 months, he lived off his savings, took classes, went to auditions and even landed a few roles. Still, he realized the actor’s life was not for him and returned to the corporate world. I admire him for following his dream, but I can’t forgive the fact that he didn’t anticipate that he would be asked about the one and a half years “missing” from his resume. Instead of stumbling through an apologetic reply, some preparation could spin this gap into a self-enhancing journey that makes him a better person today.

Remember, the next time you think you will be asked to speak impromptu, the preparation is in the anticipation.

Boost Your Pitching Success Rate

Play-off baseball is here and once again we are reminded that even the best hitters in the game fail seven out of 10 times. When it comes to pitching stories, what is your batting average? More important, will your client call you a superstar if you connect one-third of the time?

One way to boost your average is to have a better relationship with the people you are pitching. One way to get that better relationship is to talk to them even when you are not selling.

No one thinks of the person that calls them only when they need a favor as a friend. That’s not a relationship; it’s a one-way street. But the person that calls just to say “hi,” even when they don’t want anything in return, well…that’s a relationship.

Here are a few tips to help you increase your average.

Notice Their Work
Read stories by the people you are pitching, especially the ones that aren’t yours. When you see one you like, call the reporter and tell them so. You’ll be surprised how shocked they’ll be that you have no ulterior motive for calling.

Keep it Brief
Follow the first tip, but, just as if you were pitching, be considerate of the reporter’s deadlines and time restrictions.

Stay Upbeat
Having a relationship doesn’t mean that you’ll place every story you pitch. Take rejection well. Remember, it’s a marathon, not a sprint.

PR is all about relationships and calling people even when you are not selling is a great way to start. It won’t happen overnight, but as the poet Josiah Gilbert Holland wrote, “That which grows slowly, endures.”